I am a proud, strong, powerful, beautiful, confident woman. I love myself and know my worth and there are so many other positive adjectives I could use to describe myself. All of that being said, there is something so special as a woman about getting done up, even if it is just for yourself.
I have always loved getting my hair and nails done and sporting a new outfit. It wasn't to brag that I had things that others didn't. For me these trips to the salon were confidence builders, they allowed me to discover who I was and who I wanted to be. I do realize these trips were a privilege that not everyone had. I am grateful that my mom let me experiment with a great many hairstyles and colors over the years because, as questionable as it is to look back on, she let me fully discover who I was. That in and of itself is a blessing, although I cringe looking back on the hair choices my younger self made.
From a young age, I loved wearing fancy dresses, carrying purses, and wearing lip gloss (The lip gloss obsession is thanks to my aunts Kathleen, Anna and Sarah... hahaha).... and jewelry, I loved necklaces, rings and bracelets if you couldn't tell, I wanted to be a princess, and honestly I still do... who wouldn't? I wanted to do things that the women in my life did. I didn't realize it at the time but now I realize that I have always had a strong sense of femininity in life that taught me how great being a woman was. Although each one of the women in my life exudes an abundance of femininity none of them were weak. In their own ways, they each taught me that strength and femininity are intertwined when the world wants us to believe that femininity is synonymous with weakness.
Of course, I grew up knowing that feeling beautiful made you powerful or at least I believed that, but as I grew into adolescence and hit puberty and had experienced the world as it presented itself to me, I had forgotten. I had forgotten that beauty laid in the eyes of the beholder. I had forgotten that it didn't matter what everyone else thought and that even if I didn't feel beautiful, I was. During this time, I was doing everything that I thought would make me beautiful or popular, even though I didn't want to admit it, it wasn't me. If I'm being completely honest, at the time I only felt confident when I was on stage or dolled up for dances in a fancy dress and done up hair and makeup. These feelings continued until the middle of my junior year of high school and one instrumental weekend. After that, I decided to wear my hair naturally and do things that actually made me happy, not what I thought everyone else wanted.
When I sat down to write this blog I wasn't thinking about all this stuff from my past. I was inspired to write this because I recently bought myself a pack of fake nails. It had been at least a year since I had gotten any form of self-pampering. I know it's a super small thing but putting these fake nails on made me feel so good, I had even told my friends that putting these nails on made me like I had regained my full power a as a woman, and I felt so confident for the rest of the day. As silly as it is, It helped me remember that acknowledging your beauty makes you powerful.
During this time of quarantine, I have been able to realize and reflect on many things in my life and about the world, but until I put the fake nails on I had not yet realized how much I missed doing things for myself no matter how surface level it is. For me, getting my nails done or getting a haircut makes me feel lighter and more like myself. That shouldn't be a bad thing! I want to leave all of you with this idea, Treating yourself is self-care, Feeling beautiful is self-care, Asking for help is self-care, self-care is what you make it but just do it. There are so many people out there that don't treat themselves kindly and it causes them a world of hurt.
"It is not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority. It's necessary." --- Mandy Hale